It’s a heavy weight that bears upon your soul and mind. It whispers defeat and urges you to give up. What once was an exciting pursuit of a dream or goal that inspired you, is now a big question mark. It causes you to look around at what others are doing and compare yourself to them.
Will your hard work ever pay off? Why does it come so easy for them? Will you ever be noticed? Do you really make a difference? Is it worth it? Do I matter? Will God ever answer my prayer?
Discouragement will creep its way into your life and try to trap you in its prison. Share on X
When these feelings come, what should you do to free yourself?
Pray
I remember the discouragement I felt every month for 6 years as my husband and I tried to conceive. I went through 14 failed artificial inseminations. Although I felt discouraged, my hope for a baby never wavered.
Hannah knew the pain of discouragement as well. She lived a modern-day reality show as she watched the man she loved have children with his other wife Peninnah while she remained barren. Every year, her husband Elkanah went with them to worship at the tabernacle and every year, Peninnah would “provoke her in order to irritate her.” She bullied her until she wept. I’m sure Peninnah was jealous because the Bible says that Hannah was the one Elkanah loved.
What did Hannah do with her discouragement? She prayed. She pleaded through bitter tears. She promised God that if he gave her a son she would give him to the Lord for all the days of his life. And when she was done pouring her heart out to God she felt better. Do you know what she did? The Bible says she “went her way and ate something and her face was no longer downcast.” Her burden was lifted and she was able to resume normal activity.
Hannah’s prayer was answered. The Bible says the Lord “remembered’ Hannah. She had a son named Samuel whose name meant “Because I asked the Lord for him.”
But what if your prayer isn’t answered? I remember thinking, if I could only find that spiritual formula that would get God’s attention–maybe if I prayed harder, longer, like Hannah, then just maybe God would answer my prayer, too.
But what I love about this passage is that Hannah found peace before her prayer was answered! A discouraged heart can find peace in the middle of the pain. And that is encouraging!
A discouraged heart can find peace in the middle of the pain. Share on X
When we are discouraged we need to fight through our emotions in prayer and tell God our honest feelings. He can take it.
Evaluate Your Goal and the Right Way to Achieve It
First, evaluate what you are trying to achieve. Pray for discernment for God to show you what path to take. As much as I wanted a baby, there was a point where I knew the fertility treatments were not working. It was hard to stop since I longed to be a mom and stopping felt like I was giving up.
But it was the right step. I needed to get off of the emotional roller coaster. I never gave up my hope and desire to have a child and we still tried, but without outside treatment. I believe that God opened my womb just like he did for Hannah… and praise God, I now have 4 children!
If you are lost and unsure exactly how to pursue your goal, then pray for God to direct you. God will lead you.
Isaiah 42:16
And I will lead the blind
in a way they do not know
in paths that they have not known
I will guide them. I will turn the darkness
before them into light
the rough places into level ground.
These are the things I will do and I do not forsake them.
Remember your Mission
Have you thought about making a mission statement for your goal? What do you want to accomplish? Maybe it’s for your career, education, small group, marriage, parenting…? Mission statements help us determine if our goals are being met and help us gauge success. Success is not measured in numbers, recognition or money but in following your mission.
Success is not measured in numbers, recognition or money but in following your mission. Share on X
My mission for this blog is to bring hope and encouragement to struggling marriages, overwhelmed moms, and people striving to know their worth. If I get discouraged about how many viewers I have then I have lost focus of my mission. When I remember my mission, I can feel successful because I know I am making a difference. The time, money and effort of maintaining a blog is worth it to me because it fulfills my purpose and mission in life.
If you are discouraged in your ministry then allow God to give you rest.
Matthew 11:28
Come to me all who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest.
Galatians 6:9
And let us not grow weary in doing good for in due season we will reap if we do not give up.
Remember God is With You
Joshua 1:9
Do not be afraid
Do not be discouraged
for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
Isaiah 41:10
Fear not for I am with you
be not dismayed for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
When you are weary, don’t take action until you pray, evaluate and remember your mission. And then come before the Lord as you lay aside your burden and rest.
Download this free printable to help you when you are discouraged. Print the verses on white card stock and cut out.
What discouragement are you trying to break free from today? I would love for you to share in the comment section below so that I can pray for you!
Hello there! I'm Valerie, a mom of four and wife of 27 years. My writing inspires others to cultivate courageous faith and find solace in trusting God, especially in moments of fear and uncertainty. Join me on this adventure as we explore the beauty of trusting God when we are afraid. 
Hey Val!
Congrats on being featured over at Lori’s Moments of Hope. I can see that this post has given hope to many discouraged women. Keep up the good work, my friend! Blessings to you and your family. Keep that cord of 6 tight!
Valerie, I just loved this post! How often the enemy succeeds in discouragement because we aren’t in tune to recognize the source. My deepest discouragements have been when I focused on the issue instead of the Source of Peace. Your advice is full of practical wisdom. So glad I found you on Me, Coffee and Jesus! I’d love for you to share on #FreshMarketFriday Link-up also! Blessings, Crystal~
Such a beautiful testimony Valerie! I love how you pointed out how we can find peace in the midst of the trial. That is the difference between the hope we have and the lack of hope the world has. We can have peace in the midst because we know Who is on our side, working on our behalf. Such encouraging words today. Thank you for sharing.
Oh Valerie- I loved this post! I can see your heart of desperately wanting to encourage others and that is so inspiring! My favorite way to break free that you shared was knowing that God is with us. He is with us always even when we don’t feel Him. Thank you so much for your encouragement today!!!
What an honest and heart felt post! It seems you are following your mission and God continues to bless you Valerie! We definitely have to beware of discouragement. I feel it is one of Satan’s favorite tools. I love the tips and the bible verses you shared here. Isaiah 42:16 is a great one I had not heard before. We need to trust God’s leading. I cannot think of a better guide in the dark! I shared this on my inspiration pinterest board. Have a wonderful week and may God bless you and yours!
What a great word, Valerie!
I think we can all relate – all of us have down days and down season.
Discouragement is no respecter of persons!
Blessed by your message, by the hope, and by these verses!
Sharing all over today~
Melanie
I love how the Word of God brings such peace and hope when we are discouraged. Thank you for your encouragement in my life, Melanie. You bless me!
Valerie-I appreciate your message, especially at such a trying time. I’m disabled, with a disabled child, and it feels as if our lives are just falling apart. I trust God with all my heart but I must admit that I do get weary at times. Please pray for my family…
I’m so sorry for all that you are going through, Dee. Thank you so much for sharing the discouragement you’ve been feeling lately. I will definitely be praying for you! May God give you peace and comfort through the Holy Spirit and His Word. May the peace of God that transcends all understanding, guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7). Praying for you and your family!
Thank you very much for this post Valerie.It really speaks directly to me and about my situation. Currently I am going through the challenges of delayed marriage and unemployment.I completed my first degree in 2004, second in 2010 and I have been actively searching for a life partner since 2008. Apart from the fact that I have to deal with the longing and desire to meet someone special, a godly man to spend my life with, I also have to deal with societal pressures as well. Unlike in the West, over here in Africa being unmarried in your mid-thirties is very hard: you are stigmatized both by family and the society. The most prevalent cultural view about the delayed marriage situation is that one is under a curse. A spiritual attack. Unemployment on the other hand, just strips one off self dignity and the level of unemployment in my country is very high. All my siblings and virtually all my friends are already married with children and most have successful careers. While I am happy for them, I often ask God “what about me”? or “why am I in this”? Although, last month I started praying again especially at midnight, but I am completely overwhelmed with sadness, discouragement, and sometimes hopelessness. Sometimes I’m even suicidal because I know God can do it, but am like if HE won’t answer me, then what’s the point. It’s difficult. In October, I was lead in my spirit to study the book of 1st and 2nd Samuel, I read the story about Hannah, but it was her thanksgiving to God that really ministered to me. Presently I’m studying about Joseph. I am still on this “Journey” praying and fighting hard to remain hopeful.
Dearest Ngozi,
I am so very sorry for the sadness and discouragement you are facing. It must be so hard to deal with that cultural pressure and the view that being unmarried is a curse. I want you to know that I’m going to pray for you. I hope that you continue to seek Jesus to give you peace and hope. This world is not our final home and sadly it can be very painful. But Jesus came to give you hope in the midst of it all. And no matter what happens, you will always have the Lord. When I finally became pregnant, after 6 years…the next day I was having cramping and could barely stand up. I was told I was having an ectopic pregnancy. I was told I was bleeding inside and would die if I didn’t have emergency surgery. I didn’t understand why God would answer my prayer for a child and then take it away. I went into surgery…not understanding…but I remember feeling peace and hope. Even though it felt like I lost everything and I didn’t know if I would ever become a mother…I knew that I had the most important thing in the world to me..my relationship with Jesus. Nothing could take that away from me. The hymn “turn your eyes upon Jesus…look full in His wonderful face..and the things of this earth will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace” played in my head. There was a woman next to me in the emergency room who tried to commit suicide. She heard my tears and said, “You are crying because you are trying to save a life..and I tried to take mine tonight.” I shared the song with her and told her the same…that Jesus is our hope in this world. We can hang onto him..no matter what. As they wheeled her away..I knew that God brought us together in order to show us that He cares. When I woke up..God did a miracle. They couldn’t find the bleeding. They couldn’t explain it. They said they thought I was still pregnant. And I was. Her name is Madeline Faith. I had to have faith that God had a plan..even when I didn’t understand it. And so sweet Ngozi..I pray that you can hold onto the Lord..and let the things of the world grow strangely dim..in the light of His glory and grace. Please don’t give up. I pray that God will comfort you and that He would fulfill the desires of your heart, so that you too can look back and see His great mercies. God Bless you!
Thank you so much for this post. I so needed it today. We are also believing God for more children. I really thought that I was pregnant this cycle, but found out yesterday that I wasn’t. I know that it will happen, but sometimes it is hard not to be discouraged. Thank you for the encouragement. It was more than that too though. My Father used it to answer me when I did ask him for assurance and to remind me that he knows what I need and puts it in place before I need it, so that it will be there at the precise time I need it most. God is so good. 🙂
Dear Sara,
Thank you so much for sharing. My heart aches for you as I remember believing I was pregnant so many times and feeling so sad every month. I pray that God will continue to lead you along with signs of his hope and love for you. And you are right. Even though I NEVER understood the years of painful waiting…God knew the precise timing that was right for me to become a mom. And when that time came it was like he paved the way. I wrote a little bit about my struggle in this post below. I plan on writing a specific post in the future about my infertility journey to help other women hold onto hope. God bless you Sara!
https://www.valeriemurray.com/when-you-doubt-gods-love-in-grief/
I have been going through something with my Church. I feel discouraged and ready to leave the Church. I feel like some of the people there are against members of my family. I am the only one in my family that goes to Church and it is hard to go knowing that some of them do not like my Family member and talks about him. I just do not know what to do.
Dear Betty,
I am so sorry that you are going through this. The church, the body of Christ, should be the arms of Jesus reaching out, loving and caring for all who come. I pray that God would give you wisdom and guidance in how to handle this. I pray that God would fill you with his peace and that you can come to a resolution. Thank you for sharing your heart here, Betty, I’m going to be praying for you.
It is hard to watch my children grow up and make decisions that I know will hurt them. I pray for them, and try to tell them what to do, but they are their own individuals. All I can do is my best and trust that God will be able to help them in ways that I cannot. I have seen God’s hand in my life too many times to doubt, but still doubt and discouragement creep in. Thank you for the reminder of the helps to break free of the discouragement cycle.
I’m so sorry Laura. That must be so heart-wrenching! I pray that you can find peace and comfort as you pour out your heart before God. He cares about you and loves you. My prayers are with you.
Thank you so much for this!!! I’ve been a locked-up mess lately, and God increasingly has heaped help, encouragement, and strength upon me again!!! 😀 So happy… yeah!!! The Lord has delivered me, and I’m so glad!!!! Thank you again for this awesome little post of truth.
Jenna, I am so thankful that this post has encouraged you. I’m sorry you are in the midst of a storm and I pray that as you cling to the Lord you will find comfort and peace in HIs amazing love for you. I really appreciate your kind words. I love hearing from readers because it encourages me so much. God bless you!
Thank you SO much for this!!!! I’ve been in a storm, and God has tremendously helped me out finally, but as I look back this article helps me still… It’s like He’s heaping encouragement on me… ♥
Thank you for your beautiful story of perseverance, Valerie. I was moved by your post and how you showed us that Hannah didn’t stay downcast. She trusted God. Even before any answer to her prayer she trusted. Oh, let us follow her example. Let us pray with tears, then wipe them away, and get back to our business, knowing God is right there with us.
Thank you again.
Love to you from Arizona.
Gleniece, I am so glad that you visited! Your comment blessed me! I pray that I may be more like Hannah in my perseverance to pray and be able to let go in trust.
Thank you for all of the Biblical reminders. These are so important!
Thank you Kelsie!
I am so glad Our Heavenly Father led me to your site. Have been going thru unemployment storm since mid-July with thousands of other coworkers due to employer bankruptcy. At same time, am studying blogging, and videography while trying to answer call on my life to promote faith-based / family-friendly entertainment. Really need to break free and YOUR blog article has provided much needed encouragement. Lord’s blessings.
I am so glad this encouraged you Mary! Your call to promote faith based entertainment sounds awesome. I just heard a sermon today that said often times when we are doing God’s work we fall prey to the myth that everything will go well in our lives. But often times following God’s way takes courage in order to fight discouragement. Keep pressing on as you will make a difference for the Lord! God bless you!
This!! “Hannah found peace before her prayer was answered! A discouraged heart can find peace in the middle of the pain.” Yes, excellent post, I love your words here which pronounce truth and wisdom. Thank you so much for sharing this with our community at Grace & Truth! You are vital to the Kingdom! Well done.
Your kind words put a smile on my face and really encouraged me! Thank you Holly!
Oh my goodness. Been there have have fought to get out. Consistency is key. I pray it never returns! Visiting from SVSLU. Would love you to post at out new Fit Faith Link Up. Thanks Gina
I’m so glad you stopped by Gina! I would love to include this in your link-up tomorrow. Thank you for the invite!
Such an encouraging post at a good time! I saw your title on #RaRaLinkup and knew I needed a boost..I took a long sabbatical from my once fulfilling, purposeful career that was no longer working –yet a new vision hasn’t emerged clearly — your words help to remember to pray for God to guide me, to trust, and have faith and patience–for God to use me for a new purpose and make this clear! Thank you much!
Kathy, I’m so glad that this spoke to you. I pray that God will open a new door for you and use your gifts in a fulfilling way. Thank you so much for your kind words.
Unfortunately most if not all of us have had our periods of discouragement. Learning to deal with it and not allowing it to overpower us is the key to success. Thanks for sharing
So true Mardene! Not letting discouragement overpower us is the key. Thank you for visiting!
Great post and some really moving tweetables in there. Tweeted!
Thank you so much for sharing! Have a great day!
I like the idea of having a mission statement. This is a really great post and great reminder. So encouraging particularly the passage in Isaiah.
Thank you Jonathan. I appreciate your kind words.
Incredible message, Valerie! So awesome to visit with you. Your words are so full of encouragement. Thanks so much for sharing! Peace and many blessings to you, Love! 🙂
Thank you Tai! I’m so glad you were encouraged. Peace and blessings to you as well!
Amen! So thankful that we can receive freedom in ALL areas of life!
I’m so thankful that Christ came that we may live free in His grace and purpose for our lives. Thank you for your comment Caroline!
I have always found Hannah’s story so encouraging, thank you for sharing your thoughts on it.
Discouragement is natural, it when we allow it to take over, become an idol in our days, that it’s dangerous. We need to give those feelings and thoughts over to Him in prayer, and see what beauty He creates.
Marissa
These are always things I need to hear, I tend to have an up where I am a total go getter and I know I can do it and it the next moment my anxiety rolls up and says, you can’t. It’s disheartening at times.
I’m so glad you stopped by Nicole. I tend to be the same way. I’m always going back to my mission when I feel discouraged so that I get back on track.
What an encouraging read. Thank you for the printable verses. 🙂
I related to Hannah’s story as well. I prayed sobbing on my bed when we couldn’t even find an adoption agency that would work with us due to costs or other issues. I finally got to a place in which I said, God if you don’t want me to be a mom, please give me a different direction for my mothering instincts. The next agency was the right one and less than 9 months later, we had a baby. It was worth the wait for me to be willing to give up what I wanted more than anything to God. Feels a bit like Abraham and Isaac as well. Raising her for Him everyday.
What a beautiful testimony Jennifer! When you are waiting for years its hard to understand God’s timing. But to God a 1000 days are like a day. We can look back at our life now and see how God’s timing is always the best. Praise be to God!
Valerie, I always love visiting, and today was such a blessing. I love Hannah’s story. My heart aches for the ache you suffered for so long and rejoices with celebration for the 4 treasures you have now! And I SO identify with the numbers vs mission thing. It’s easy to lose site of the mission and feel as though I am not succeeding! Thank you for giving me extra strength to fight off those doubts and insecurities!
Blessings and smiles,
Lori
Hi Lori! Thank you so much. It’s easy to get discouraged sometimes and I have to remind myself to fight off insecurities too. I love your writing and am always blessed when you stop by. Thank you friend!
Hi Valerie,
Thank you so much for linking this post with me at Moments of Hope. I remember it well and it blessed me so much then and again today. I cannot imagine the ache of infertility and was just having a conversation struggling with it right now. I am going to forward this to her!
Love you!
Lori
and keep on praying – God hears our prayers!
Amen to that Andi!
What an encouraging post today, Valerie!
14 failed artificial inseminations – wow. That must have been tough! Thank you for using your misery to offer a very encouraging ministry!
And, I love how you related it all to blogging – “If I get discouraged about how many viewers I have then I have lost focus of my mission. When I remember my mission, I can feel successful because I know I am making a difference.”
There have been some posts that I have written that I really only wrote for one person’s encouragement. If that one person was minister to, then I succeeded!
I found your post on Grace and Truth today. I think this one is one of your best~
Blessings,
Melanie
Wow Melanie! I appreciate your words of encouragement. I’m so glad to have met you, I consider it an honor to work along side you in CBB and in our common ministry of blogging.
Abby, I’m so sorry that it’s not God’s timing for your prayer. I hope that God will soon reveal a better path for you and an answer to your prayers. I’m glad that you have found peace in Him. God bless you!
Thank you for this beautiful reminder. We are dealing with some pretty serious health issues in our family, and the doctor once again reminded us that they are not working for a cure, just prolonging life expectancy. It’s so easy to become discouraged when you hear things like that, but we are relying on the Great Physician. If healing does come it will be through Him, and He will get all the glory!
Oh Marian, I am so sorry that you have heard such discouraging news from the doctor. I will be praying for your family. I pray that the Lord will bring healing and strength to face this hard road.
Thank you for the prayers, they are very much appreciated! I found your post on Grace and Truth. I’ve never clicked over there before, but I’m glad I did today!
My family is keeping you in our prayers Marian.
Valerie, Your blog reminded me of Elizabeth. She may have wondered why God wouldn’t answer her prayer for a child. It turned out He had bigger plans. He was waiting for her cousin Mary to grow old enough to conceive. Elizabeth’s son would be the forerunner of Jesus. How we need to remember God’s perfect love for us and perfect timing when He doesn’t seem to be answering our heartfelt prayers. So thankful He blessed you with four precious children! Visiting from Grace and Truth linkup.
Hi Debbie,
Your words speak truth, “We need to remember God’s perfect love for us and perfect timing when He doesn’t seem to be answering our heartfelt prayers.” His ways are greater than our ways and His thoughts greater than ours.
Hannah’s story has always blessed my heart. You are right, she found peace before her answer! The revealing of her heart, the need to be heard and understood by God, and the validation of both made it possible for her to continue. I am encouraged by your words.
Blessings,
Dawn
Hello Dawn!
I’m so glad that you were encouraged. Hannah’s story has always touched my heart. I seem to learn more every time I read about her. Thank you for stopping by.
Prayer is so important in all areas of our lives. Without prayer I don’t know how crazy life could get!
Hi Susannah,
Prayer keeps us focused on the Lord and not our problems. Thank you for your comment.
What a beautiful testimony and this is so timely for me. I am slowly seeing that a prayer I prayed for months may not be in God’s will. It’s just not his timing. There is so much peace in surrendering to his plans. Thanks for sharing this, Valerie. And praise God for those children!