I struggled for many years on Mother’s Day.
I will never forget the day I walked out of church holding back my sobs. I desperately wanted to be a mom. And on this particular Mother’s Day, the evidence that I wasn’t one was more than I could handle.
I felt like the only woman still sitting down as all the Mother’s stood up. But I was able to hold back the tears until the worship pastor began to sing a beautiful song he wrote to his wife, thanking her for making him a daddy. And, I lost it.
Years of infertility and emotional pain were a daily presence for me. Mother’s Day only brought those afflictions to the surface. After going through 6 years of infertility, I will always feel a need to be sensitive to women longing for motherhood.
Days that are good and worth celebrating often bring pain to the surface for those who are suffering.
Do you know anyone struggling with infertility?
They may need a hug and some extra prayers today.
And so I write this post not to discourage you from celebrating. Mothers should be honored and appreciated on this day for all of their love, work, and sacrifice.
Instead, I write to remind us that on a day where many people rejoice, there are also some who mourn.
Romans 12:15 says
Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
It was one of the happiest days of my life. October 19th, 2005. My son, Brennan was born. But there’s a woman somewhere who remembers that day as being one of the saddest days she will ever experience.
We arrived at the hospital at the same time, both of us walking through labor pains to the front desk. Our beds were next to each other as we waited for a room. I arrived first, so my vitals were taken before hers and they put the baby’s heart monitor around my pregnant belly.
As the nurses examined my neighbor, I could sense the tension building in the room. They called for the doctor. The curtains were closed. They unhooked the monitor that echoed the sound of my son’s beating heart.
I heard the doctor say the most devastating words a mother could ever hear. “I’m sorry, but there’s no heartbeat.”
And then the cries of grief encompassed the entire room, even though there was a curtain dividing us. I wept for her and experienced conflicting feelings for the joy I was about to experience.
I went through labor and delivered a healthy baby boy. She delivered a baby she had to say goodbye to.
I left the hospital holding my son.
She left with empty arms, an empty heart and came home to an empty nursery.
I don’t know her name or who she is. But every October 19th, I pray for her. I will never forget her.
Mother’s Day may be painful for those who have lost a child. They may need some extra support. Will you take a moment and pray for them right now?
Sometimes a supportive hug speaks the words you don’t know how to say.
September 11, 2010. I heard sounds from my husband that alerted and scared me, causing me to rush over to see what was wrong—sounds of utter grief. My husband struggled to get the words out, “Watch the kids!”
He brought my daughter back who had spent the night with Grandma. Then he ran back to my mother-in-law’s. She lived one house over.
I called 911. But it was too late. She was gone. My poor husband found his mother dead. She had a brain aneurysm in the middle of the night while my 7-year-old daughter was having a sleepover with her. My daughter had been alone with her all morning trying to wake her up.
My husband lost his dad two years previously. He tried to resuscitate him in the hospital but it was too late.
After losing both his parents, my husband began to suffer from panic attacks and post-traumatic stress disorder. I can’t even imagine the pain of losing my parents. It’s too hard for me to even think about.
If you are grieving over the loss of your mom today, my heart goes out to you. I pray that God would comfort you every time you miss your mom.
As Mother's Day approaches let's rejoice but also remember those who may need a little encouragement. Click To Tweet
We can rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. We can do both on the same day.
If you are going through a difficult time, I hope these verses comfort you.
What are you rejoicing in today? How can you be sensitive to those around you as you rejoice in the blessings God has given you? I would love for you to comment below.
- Ask God to help you be mindful of what others are going through today.
- Think before you say something that may be hard for someone to hear.
- Pray for the person God brings to your mind.
- Give them a hug.