“I’m supposed to have the reindeer paper!”
Tears streamed down her cheeks; my 7-year-old folded her arms and stomped out of the room.
I spent the day wrapping gifts. Every year, each of my 4 kids picks their own wrapping paper so I don’t have to use tags. After school, they scurry under the tree and hunt for another gift.
But I accidentally wrapped Meghan’s in the Christmas tree paper.
When I was wrapping, I noticed tiny silver sparrows on each tree. Sparrows are a special sign between God and I.
After 6 years of infertility, the constant reminders of my barrenness exhausted me to the point of anger. When I heard tiny sparrows chirping in a tree, and remembered how God said he cared about each one—knowing when one sparrow fell out of a tree, I let God in on my frustration.
“I don’t believe it, God! How could you possibly care about a little bird, when you don’t even care about me enough to answer my prayer for a child. I’ve dreamt of being a mommy since I was a little girl!”
A few hours later, I opened my Bible and Matthew 10:29 stared right back, highlighted in bright yellow. My anger melted in the embrace of my Heavenly Father’s love. The same love that would remind me of His daily presence in my pain—little sparrows perched on a limb; in picture frames, calendars, notepads, mugs, decorations, and yes, even wrapping paper.
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Matthew 10:29-31 (NIV)
I placed my hands on my daughter’s angry shoulders and told her there was something very special about her paper.
My daughter loves to give me gifts representing her love—like the colorful snowflake keychain, “to remind you of my love” or the special crooked cut-out heart, “to remember me by” or “The Book of Us” as mother and daughter mermaids, frogs, horses, and bees.
I could tell her heart was softening, but her body wanted to stand in its stubborn stance.
“Mommy loves sparrows. I even have a special picture daddy gave me with Jesus holding a branch with little birds on it. Daddy gave it to me for our anniversary when I didn’t think I could be a mommy. Do you want to see it?”
Her stubbornness refused, but I could tell she wanted to say yes.
A few seconds later, she grabbed my hand, “Mommy, take me to that picture daddy gave you!”
I read the verse to her:
“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” Matthew 6:26
The next day, we were Christmas shopping and Meghan spotted a purse with a bird on it. “Get this, Mom!” When it was time to write Christmas cards for her teachers, she snatched the cards with a golden bird on it.
As I look back on my life, there have been some difficult times when I felt like God was giving the best to someone else.
And like my daughter, sometimes I fold my arms when life doesn’t turn out as I think it should–times when I question His love because I can’t see the beautiful path He’s preparing for me.
In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. Proverbs 16:9
Whatever you are going through–whether it’s financial stress, marital struggles, illness, waiting on a diagnosis, my prayer is that you would notice the sparrows, and remember that God has not forgotten you. Just as He knows when one sparrow falls from a tree, He knows your situation. He loves you. And He promises to take care of you.
Do you need prayer this Christmas? Leave your request and I would love to pray for you. You’re welcome to encourage others as well.
Hello there! I'm Valerie, a mom of four and wife of 27 years. My writing inspires others to cultivate courageous faith and find solace in trusting God, especially in moments of fear and uncertainty. Join me on this adventure as we explore the beauty of trusting God when we are afraid. 
Love your wrapping paper idea. Thank you for the beautiful reminder of the sparrows.
This story touched my soul. I know how infertility feels. We need to keep faith in God. He really has some good plans for all of us.
Thank you for your kind words. Merry Christmas Stephanie!
Valerie! I just love this post!!! I can totally relate to the way you felt when you went through infertility. I went down that same road for five years! But God is faithful!!! He never left me even when I questioned Him. I am now the mother of 3 precious through the miracles of adoption and birth! I love the story of the sparrow!!!
Oh Emily—I always feel a special kinship with others who have known the pain of infertility. I’m so happy that you are the mother of 3 miracles now. Blessings to you. And Merry Christmas!
I would like to request prayer for a better attitude toward my husband and daughter. I have momma anger pretty bad and I would like to be a loving gentle calm and patient mommy and wife. Pray for me to seek God in this weakness of mine and to lean on His Grace to change me. My marriage is not very peaceful either please pray for me to be willing to let go of pride and selfishness and be willing to be kind and gentle and show my husband grace. Pray for me to be quick to listen slow to speak and slow to anger. Thank you for our prayers.
Angela P.
Angela, I’m sorry it’s taken me a few days to reply to your comment. I want to thank you for being so open and sharing struggles that I know many of us face. Your comment touched my heart because it was real and honest. Dear Father, I lift up Angela to you and pray that you would help her when she feels angry and overwhelmed. Sometimes it seems like it can be so hard to control anger. But Lord, by your Holy Spirit, you give us the power to live according to your spirit within us and not our flesh. So, thank you that we are not hopeless cases. Lord, it’s also so hard when there is stress in a marriage and when it’s Christmas time it feels even more painful. So I pray that you would help Angela to find her peace in you this Christmas. Fill her heart with your love so that she would pour out your love to her husband and daughter. Lord, thank you that you see us. You care. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Beautiful reminder Valerie. Perfect timing for me, especially this weekend. I know in my heart t that God loves me. It has been frustrating battling all the various health issues this year especially..In fact, a painful one just popped up this week. I am trying to keep my eyes on Christ, but the pain can be distracting. Pleas pray that this latest issue will clear up and heal quickly. I hope to celebrate Christmas with my family and worship my Savior.Have a wonderful Christmas season with your family and may God bring you many blessings in the new year.
Horace, I am so sorry to hear of your recent health issue added to the ones you already have. I will be praying for you! Dear Jesus, Horace is a man of God who loves you. He has been through so much and has always used his pain to help others. Lord, it’s so hard to be in pain during the holidays. I pray that you would give him wisdom and direction on how to treat this new symptom/issue, so that he can spend Christmas with the family he loves. Help him find relief from the pain he is in. Help him to get some sleep. Heal him, Lord. Minister to him. Be his strength in this season. Get him through it. Thank you that we are in your constant care. Amen
Such a sweet reminder. I am currently being tested for Carcinoid with Carcinoid. A rare Neuroendocrine cancer. Along with Gallbladder and intestinal issues. I also have untreated Inflammatory Polyarthritis. It is untreated as I have been allergic to the biologics used to treat them. I am allergic to Latex and Medical Adhesives. I have been in intense pain for three years with no pain medicine, simply due to erroneous information (doctor’s notes) that is in my medical records. I have tried to get it removed, but I was told that it is in the records permanently.They are saying that I am a Drug-seeking Drug Abuser who is also a Non-compliant Patient. Not even my pain management doctor will put me on pain meds. None of it is true.
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But my prayer request is for my husband. There is a very real possibility that he has a rare Primary Immunodeficiency Disease which requires a biologic medication and he is refusing to go to the doctor to discuss it along with the evidence in his last CAT Scan. Now, he has also lost a filling and has had a molar break off and he is refusing to go to the dentist.
But because he is an adult, I cannot force him to go. But due to the disease he is not thinking Clearly and I have None who are willing to convince him how he needs to talk with his doctor or how his poor choices are affecting both of us adversely. Family knows, but do nothing. Except for one Sister-in-law who has been helping me try to get the things I require. Our needs are great but finances are nonexistent.
Please pray him. June 26th will be our 14th wedding anniversary. If he doesn’t get to the doctor and dentist he may not be here to celebrate…
For this prayer to be answered would make My Entire Christmas.
I’m so very sorry to hear about all the health issues you are dealing with. Dear Heavenly Father, you see this prayer request and you know every need. Please comfort the pain she is in and help her get the help she is in need of. Father I pray for her husband to seek the medical treatment he needs. Give them strength and relief from pain. Lord, may your love comfort those who are hurting this Christmas. Hold their hand through their suffering. Be their peace.Thank you that you never leave us or forsake us.
Dear Valerie, what a sweet yet powerful lesson you have shared. We often stand so close to the problem, we fail to believe in faith that the Lord has an answer. We just may have to wait for it. Thanks for sharing and may you and your family share the love,joy and peace that comes from knowing our Savior, Christ Jesus the Messiah.
Well said, Marie. Just like a quilt, we only see one patch at a time, and God sees the whole beautiful end result. I hope you have a blessed Christmas filled with the joy of the Lord. God bless you!